30 ~ A frenzied search for air ~

During the first day, prior to being transfered.. A junior Dr on call removed the oxygen. No reason stated. No questions asked or explanations sought why I was given it in the first place. Only doing a check up thinking I should be fine.

Wait to see where “fine” took me..?

My lungs recuperated slightly & filled in a little oxygen to tow me through a couple of hours…. Not long enough though…. Before drama unfolded….

(This is not a real picture but one found in close similarity to where I stayed first after ER. A bed positioned next to the window, same cabinet but slightly different bed)

Soon after difficulty the Almighty will bring ease.

[ NIGHT 2 –

WARD 260 ]

Is a mid way stop for patients requiring transferal into a ward suitably related to their actual condition. I needed to be placed into the respiratory ward because I was admitted due to shortness of breath. However due to a shortage of beds, I remained here until the termination of my hospital stay & it was only for the best.

A clean, calm, quiet & peaceful atmosphere.

A wonderful nurse cheerfully welcomed & settled me in.

I let out a huge sigh of relief, contentment & gratitude.

My heart felt silent plea was answered!

Contrary to every expection or thoughts held regarding some nurses after my sisters nightmare of a hospital experience..

I was met with the complete opposite. Nurses who turned every tough moment into a light hearted one.

Talking about psychic disorders in previous posts, I find myself the only sane patient in a ward filled with psychic patients.

“Mmmm this is theee definition of psychic disorders” I thought after observing & spending the first few hours together in 1 room.

There are 3 psychic wards in the hospital but all were full.. These patients were temporarily placed here awaiting spaces there.

**Names are changed for confidentiality.

Introducing you to my 3 room mates who provided continous entertainment:

1) Katy.

2) Sara.

3) Nelly from Congo.

Becoming fimiliar with each other.. Brief introductions were made then I layed back to rest.

Feeling comfortable & at ease.. Not long thereafter.

Knock, knock, knock.

“Come in” – Katy calls out.

The door opens…

A Dr walks in!

Looking at 4 faces then addresses me saying:

“You’re the young girl with Autonomic Neuropathy I’ve been called in to review?

*Me nodding head*: “Yes”

Walks to the table infront of my bed, pulls out note pad & pen…

Dr number 7 – Who spent approximately 2 hours writing down every symptom & fine detail. The first neurologist who listened – believing my symptoms to be real.

He listened patiently encouraging me to take my time, no rush. Bearing the breathlessness-related-exertion issue realising matters seem to be serious, not simple.

He listened, shocked by the manifestation of symptoms.

He listened with compassion.

He listened patiently & empathetically (not that I ask or look for it in any way & of course I DO NOT expect sympathy from Drs because they’re dealing with tons of patients daily & will probably go crazy if they feel everyone sorry! I too would if I were a Dr) But when it is shown from a Drs side, one is left touched.

Conclusion deduced:

“This is a very intriguing, interesting presentation of a case. A case the type of which has not been dealt with previously. Lots of thought & discussion is needed. Tomorrow my senior consultant will be brought to finalize tests”

Dr G: Perchance you read this post or blog one day.. Please know! Your kindness expressed was appreciated more than you ever realised!!


• Codeine was prescribed to suppress a “cough” due to the role it plays in drying excess fluid build up in the lungs – mentioned by a Dr when I questioned the reason for it being prescribed.

This cough is no ordinary one resulting from flu, bronchitis like illnesses etc.

A cough different in nature which continues up to date.

A type of cough which will be discussed on day 5.

Codeine is an opioid analgesic given / taken to block pain. However there are other purposes as well.

• Dr G came in with his consultant, together discussed & agreed that autonomic dysfunction is the culprit! Tests scheduled will be a Nerve Conduction Study (NCS) & Tilt Table Test.

These tests will be explained at a later stage, God willing.

Visiting hours were only once a day from 3-5pm. So I was delighted to be afforded with the opportunity of having the presence of 2 family members around often: Uncle (Dr Ismail) & cousin (Shehnaz) 😀😀

Dad’s brother is a Prothodontist working at Johannesburg Academic & his daughter is an Occupational Therapist working at a building across the hospital.

This effected well to my advantage because they’d come together / take turns to check in during the morning period & later again.

Thanks very much to both of them. All the support provided was appreciated greatly & will never be forgotten 😊😊😊

Shehnaz was my backbone the next eventful day….

Another fimilar person was Tasneem Kathrada who’s an OT in the hospital itself. She & her mum Aunty Zarina assisted lots as well. May the Almighty bless everyone abundantly!!!


Visiting hours were the most anticipated time of the day. But that particular afternoon, each hour become harder.. I found myself struggling to communicate even though everyone’s visits were enjoyed & cherished.

Not feeling good, something is going downhill again..

Mind questioned my body

As I layed back, abnormally exhausted – struggling for breath.

“Take it easy, relax, sleep & ring the bell if you not feeling “normal”. Don’t wait for them to check up. Call for help if needed, that’s the reason why you’re here”

Family reminded me.

Yeah, don’t stress. I’ll keep in touch.


Some time past 8:00.

I’m the only 1 awake.. room mates sleeping.

“The light won’t disturb us, switch it off when you done & shout out if you need help, ok my dear? I can see you don’t look too fine in your face”

Said Katy. A mother like figure.

30 minutes later:

Heart pounded while my lungs frantically searched for air..

I tried. I tried my best to breathe, but to no avail. This was a plight beyond my control…

Failing, failing, failing.

Katy was in a deep sleep snoring away.

(“How much wood did you grind?” I would tease her)

Gasping, gasping, gasping…

Trying to see clearly through the haze.

Suddenly she jumps out of bed.

Faintly i hear panic:

“Heyyyy 😱😱😱 Oh my god!!! Khadeeja??? What the h*** is wrong with this child?? She’s blue! Blue everywhere!!! Someone….

Haziness banished & I found myself drowning beneath waves of darkness..

Black upon black……

4 thoughts on “30 ~ A frenzied search for air ~

  1. I didn’t notice the last part of the post the first time🙈….anyway I’ve marked the day on my calendar…. May I ask if there’s any specific color or ribbon the wear on that day…?

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s