250 ~ Light on the horizon – Part 3 ~

The pulmonologist recieves us pleasantly and jots down a basic background of my history. But then the following is mentioned:

🔹 Dysautonomia does not affect the lungs – (myth)

🔹Pulmonary function tests prove there IS airway obstruction. He does not know why & was not too fazed by the impediment. To me the reason of fluid being in the lung air sacs seems obvious with crackles being heard.

🔹A decrease in certain numbers of breath intake & breath release.

🔹A graph that should be going in a certain angle under pressure when breathing out to assess lung strength, but my lungs could not stretch out that far. The angle collapsed mid-way.

He then pauses by saying the basics are done and to delve further we shall need invasive testing which will amount to a high fee not being on medical aid. So in the meantime it’s best he rings up cardiology to check if someone is in to conduct an assessment. Once the affirmative reply came, he sends me up.


Senior doctors were on call at another hospital, including Prof R with whom we had been told to consult. Instead, we come face to face with their junior – a good-natured man who I encountered no problems except one; he was too young & therefore inexperienced for my particular case.

– An echocardiogram was conducted. Valves, tissue, muscle, arteries, explained in detail.

However, here we come to the misunderstood parts:

“A partial heart attack? No ways!! There are no blockages.”

“Who’s this dr that told you all of this? Tell him I’M the heart specialist, he must come talk to me first.”

All my previous cardiology results were refuted even though I tried explaining the autonomic pathological mechanism behind. Yes of course there are no blockages. These are Coronary Artery Spasms.

On what basis????

“You’re too young”

“That only occurs in elderly people & with these *such & such* type conditions..”

“According to text book, this, this, this…”

“Who’s stressing you out?”

Out of respect, I restrained my tongue back from uttering “all the people like you who haven’t been taught and trained autonomics relating to cardiology.

“Your hearts beating too fast, because you’re in a drs office”

It beats in this manner almost all the time. No specific trigger nor confined to any situation.

In conclusion he apologized sincerely by saying:

“I’m very sorry, please forgive me for not being capable of helping you further, but simultaneously trying to indicate with emphasis; the problem is in my mind and the placebo effect it has on everything else..

Indeed! The mind is a very powerful organ. I can give a lecture on that too 😉😂😝

“Because of course, losing your job, losing friends, losing family (for some individuals), undergoing countless procedures, being poked & prodded, tests after tests, shocked with a nerve conduction study, doing pulmonary tests that trigger angina attacks, swimming from one end of the ocean to another, having people call you insane, drinking medication which is bitter and some which have side effects etc…

Is so much of fun?

Just to be dubbed with Munchausen’s Syndrome

*Sarcasm intended*

Whereas we can opt for a normal method of seeking attention if we desired? A less painful method too, may I add. Sound sensible?

Why accuse us of seeking attention when many actually become isolated after a chronic illness befalls? Do you really think people yearn for a life of isolation?

A dear aunt who worked in the medical field all her life upto the stage of retirement, mentioned a pertinent point:

“People do not realize that experience far exceeds theoretical knowledge, especially in the medical field”

Each patient and case is different. A Dr has to treat patients as individuals and not keep comparing!”

Discomfited, disheartened, and deep in thought, I retreat down the hospital corridors and back home, wordlessly repeating the following verse:

فلا يحزنك قولهم ان العزة لله جميعا هو السميع العليم
So let not their speech grieve you. Indeed, honor [due to power] belongs to Allah entirely. He is the Hearing, the Knowing.

Tomorrow a follow-up call will be made to my neurologist. I do not want to wreck my mind further by thinking what he’ll deduce from these indeterminate findings.

Right now there is one special card I want to dig out and read

Because the message conveyed thereon is precisely what I need…

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